The Skunk Blog

It’s been a long time since I did a “Letter to.”  I’ve been racking my brain pretty hard thinking about a topic to write about.  Two weeks later I didn’t have shit.  So this morning on the way to work I saw the fucking stupidest thing ever, and now I have material!  I hope you enjoy.  Letter to the guy who drives with snow on his windows.

Dear Snow Window Driver,

Hi there.  You probably couldn’t see me, since 95% of your windows were covered in snow, but I thought I would say hello anyways.  So what’s the deal, late for work this morning?  Windshield wipers broken?  Blind?  There must be a good reason why you would drive with snow completely covering all your windows.  Can I take a look inside, I bet you have radar or something…wait, no radar?  Do you have Superman vision?  There must be some reason why you think you can drive.  So what’s the deal?  Oh, that’s right, you’re dumb as shit?

Ok, did you realize it snowed 12 inches over the weekend?  Do you know that it is winter?  Why is it that I realize this and you are completely oblivious?  I just want to know how the hell you got to the highway.  You must be the most amazing person in the world; there is no way in hell I could pull off this feat.  I have only one request.  Next time, could you please start your car up about 25 minutes before you leave the house?  I know it is a lot to ask, but I’m sure everyone in your path of destruction will be very grateful.  This is actually what I did this morning.  You see, I went out before breakfast and started the car.  I then ate; watched a little news, then left.  My car was a toasty 70 degrees, and there was no snow on my windows.  You see, I had to do this, so I could see idiots like you, and play idiot dodge’em for 20 minutes.  Thanks for playing, now go fuck your mother!

-The Skunk!